Prime Time Crime  


(Published in the Chilliwack Times week of Dec.  4, 2007)


Blame the Great White North


  By John Martin

It looks like the global warming fear mongers have a new target in their cross hairs; beer-guzzling Canucks. A study commissioned by Resources Canada and reported in the New Scientist concludes that one in three Canadians have an inefficient, outdated fridge in their basement that is used for one purpose -keeping their beer cold.

According to University of Alberta researcher, Denise Young, who led the study, these energy-sucking relics have a significant impact on household greenhouse gas emissions.

"People need to understand the impact of their lifestyles," claims Joanna Yarrow, director of a sustainable development consultancy in the UK.

"Clearly the environmental implications of having a frivolous luxury like a beer fridge are not hitting home. This research helps inform people - let's hope it has an effect".

So that's it - a beer fridge is a frivolous luxury.

Young also wants provincial governments to set up beer fridge buy backs, similar to the strategy many American cities have used to get guns off the street. It could be a made-in-Canada beer fridge amnesty program.

Good idea. Get rid of your beer fridge and simply drive to the beer and wine store for a chilled six-pack every time you're thirsty. The temperature is dropping so better warm the car up for a good 10 or 15 minutes before hand though.

Seriously, if you were writing a Saturday Night Live skit to make fun of environmentalists you couldn't come up with anything nuttier than what they're already doing.

I came across an online discussion of this study and one American had this to say, "Well Canadians, are you going to give up your brew for a stupid greenie, commie theory that has no basis in scientific fact, or are you going to banish these leftist idiots to the frozen tundra of the north? If you don't, you'll be eating grass and wearing tree bark, as they want you all to live like cavemen."

It shouldn't come as a surprise that the global warm-mongers have decided to play hardball with working class citizens who actually produce something. We've seen the hypocrisy of Al Gore with his energy guzzling mansion, criss-crossing the globe in his private jet to show his pricey slide-show to anyone foolish enough to fork over a few hundred dollars.

It's much the same with our own local green guru, David Suzuki, who toured the country in a luxury motorcoach three times larger than what his entourage required so he could travel in rock-star comfort.

If the environmentalists think they're going to win any converts to their cause by attacking real people who live in the real world and enjoy a cold beer after a hard day's work, as opposed to getting paid for publishing a nonsensical study, they're truly delusional.

Which reminds me . . . it's just about time to head downstairs and crack open my first cold one of the day. I hope that fridge is plugged in.


John Martin is a Criminologist at the University College of the Fraser Valley and can be contacted at


The Great White North


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